Lemon & Pound Cake: Racism vs. Responsibility

Posted: August 1, 2013 in Uncategorized
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Before I begin my exploration on what I call, “Racism vs. Responsibility ”, let me assure the reader of a few things first. This is not an article dismissing White Racism. I repeat, this is not an article dismissing White Racism. This is also not an article demonizing Black people. This is an article demanding more Black action & more Black accountability. I’m very familiar with racial profiling, Stop & Frisk, 400 years of chattel slavery, 100 years of legal discrimination, 50 years of 2nd class citizenship, the Crack Epidemic, The War on Drugs, & the New Jim Crow. I’m hip to Redlining after World War 2, the Tuskegee Syphilis Experiment, COINTELPRO, the Move bombing in Philadelphia, & George Zimmerman’s acquittal. I’m a Black male living in the South. Experiencing Racism is as natural to me as gnats flying around my face during the summer time. I’ve marched for Mumia & protested for Trayvon. I can’t speak down on the people if I am one of the people. I’m not upper class nor do I drive a BMW. I enjoy Starbucks every other month & I do not watch Tyler Perry. I came from the same hood these people come from…my people come from. I’m simply a man tired of my culture going from one of revolution & progress, to one of stagnation & excuse making…a culture going from “yes we can” to “I cant do dis, I cant do dat”. Of course racism is real…but it is still no excuse for certain behaviors. Ants don’t whine & cry when their hill is destroyed. The ants fight, bite, unite, & get the hill back right no matter how many ants die in the process. This post is on what we can do as Black people, not what has been done to us by White people. With that being said, Revolutionary love.


“It’s not what they are doing to us, it’s what we’re not doing.”
-Bill Cosby

In the Black community, it seems as if one can’t speak about responsibility without being labeled. For instance, I was called a racist recently when I said, “Don’t invest hundreds of dollars on a pair of shoes for a 7 year old, invest in some school supplies”. I wasn’t calling out Black folks specifically…but being Black, living in the Black community, & with a passion for uplifting my Black people, I just had to be honest. I was called a racist, a classist, out of touch, an Uncle Tom, & just plain ignorant. If being honest is being a racist, I guess I’ll gladly accept that title.

Two other men have taken a similar approach when it comes to “keeping it real” with the Black community & have been met with similar reactions: Bill Cosby & Don Lemon.

Bill Cosby
In 2004, Bill Cosby gave a speech during the NAACP’s 50-year celebration of Brown vs. the Board of Education. Cosby, as the younger generation would say, “went ham”. Cosby lashed out against “people he didn’t know”. Cosby spoke against out of wedlock births, incorrect English, dress, conduct, school attendance, & most importantly, the lack of good, solid parenting. Here are some excerpts from his talk comically named the “Pound Cake Speech” because of an example he used:

*No longer is a person embarrassed because they’re pregnant without a husband. No longer is a boy considered an embarrassment if he tries to run away from being the father of the unmarried child.

*Ladies & gentlemen, the lower economic & lower middle economic people are not holding their end in this deal. In the neighborhoods that most of us grew up in, parenting is not going on.

*I’m talking about these people who cry when their son is standing there in an orange suit. Where were you when he was two? Where were you when he was twelve? Where were you when he was eighteen, & how come you don’t know he had a pistol? Where is his father & why don’t you know where he is? Why doesn’t the father show up to talk to this boy?

*Those of us sitting out here who have gone on to some college or whatever we’ve done, we still fear our parents & these people are not parenting. They’re buying things for the kid. $500 sneakers, for what? They won’t buy or spend $250 on Hooked on Phonics.

*But these people (Civil Rights Activists), the ones up here in the balcony fought so hard. Looking at the incarcerated, these are not political criminals. These are people going around stealing Coca Cola. People getting shot in the back of the head over a piece of pound cake! Then we all run out & are outraged, “The cops shouldn’t have shot him”. What the hell was he doing with the pound cake in his hand? I wanted a piece of pound cake just as bad as anybody else. I looked at it & I had no money & something called parenting said if get caught with it you’re going to embarrass your mother. Not you’re going to get your butt kicked. No. You’re going to embarrass your mother. You’re going to embarrass your family.

*Are you not paying attention, people with their hat on backwards, pants down around the crack. Isn’t that a sign of something, or are you waiting for Jesus to pull his pants up. Isn’t it a sign of something when she’s got her dress all the way up to the crack…and got all kinds of needles & things going through her body? What part of Africa did this come from? We are not Africans. Those people are not Africans, they don’t know a damned thing about Africa. With names like Shaniqua, Shaligua, Mohammed & all that crap & all of them are in jail. When we give these kinds names to our children, we give them the strength & inspiration in the meaning of those names. What’s the point of giving them strong names if there is not parenting & values backing it up?

*Brown vs. the Board of Education is no longer the white person’s problem. We’ve got to take the neighborhood back.

*It’s right around the corner. It’s standing on the corner. It can’t speak English. It doesn’t want to speak English. I can’t even talk the way these people talk. “Why you ain’t where you is go, uhh,” I don’t know who these people are & I blamed the kid until I heard the mother talk. Then I heard the father talk. This is all in the house. You used to talk a certain way on the corner & you got into the house & switched to English. Everybody knows it’s important to speak English except these knuckleheads. You can’t land a plane with “why you ain’t is…” You can’t be a doctor with that kind of crap coming out of your mouth.

*Where did these people get the idea that they’re moving ahead on this? Well, they know they’re not, they’re just hanging out in the same place, five or six generations sitting in the projects when you’re just supposed to stay there long enough to get a job & move out.

*Now look, I’m telling you. It’s not what they’re doing to us. It’s what we’re not doing. Fifty percent drop out. Look, we’re raising our own ingrown immigrants. These people are fighting hard to be ignorant. There’s no English being spoken & they’re walking & they’re angry. Oh God, they’re angry & they have pistols & they shoot & they do stupid things & after they kill somebody, they don’t have a plan. Just murder somebody. Boom. Over what? A pizza?

*It’s time for you to not accept the language that these people are speaking, which will take them nowhere. What the hell good is Brown V. Board of Education if nobody wants it?

*And then they stand there in an orange suit & you drop to your knees, “He didn’t do anything, he didn’t do anything.” Yes, he did do it & you need to have an orange suit on too.

*All of these people who lined up & done…they’ve got to be wondering what the hell happened. Brown V. Board of Education, these people who marched & were hit in the face with rocks & punched in the face to get an education & we got these knuckleheads walking around who don’t want to learn English. I know that you all know it. I just want to get you as angry that you ought to be. When you walk around the neighborhood & you see this stuff, that stuff’s not funny. These people are not funny anymore & that ‘s not brother & that’s not my sister. They’re faking & they’re dragging me way down because the state, the city & all these people have to pick up the tab on them because they don’t want to accept that they have to study to get an education.

*We have to begin to build in the neighborhood, have restaurants, have cleaners, have pharmacies, have real estate, have medical buildings instead of trying to rob them all.

*Basketball players, multimillionaires can’t write a paragraph. Football players, multimillionaires, can’t read. Yes. Multimillionaires. Well, Brown vs. Board of Education, where are we today? It’s there. They paved the way. What did we do with it? The white man, he’s laughing, got to be laughing. Fifty percent drop out, rest of them in prison.

*You got to tell me that if there was parenting, help me, if there was parenting, he wouldn’t have picked up the Coca Cola bottle & walked out with it to get shot in the back of the head. He wouldn’t have. Not if he loved his parents & not if they were parenting!

*When you go to the church, look at the stained glass things of Jesus. Look at them. Is Jesus smiling? Not in one picture. So, tell your friends. Let’s try to do something. Let’s try to make Jesus smile. Let’s start parenting. Thank you, thank you.

At that, Cosby left the stage with many an opened mouth & nervous people clapping. Had this Negro gone mad? Telling Black people what to do…who does he think he is? Cosby’s list could be summed up as followed:

5) Pull up your pants
4) Speak proper English
3) Don’t forget the sacrifices of our elders
2) Go to school
1) Be a parent

Most met Cosby with anger towards his speech, some even going as far as to write a book asking has he & the Black middle class “lost their damn minds”. People said, “Cosby is out of touch”, “Cosby is just a grumpy old man”, “He doesn’t know what he’s talking about”, & some other things I won’t slander the man with. Don Lemon was met with a similar reaction for his “No Talking Points” segment earlier this week.

Don Lemon
Don Lemon, a Black male commentator for CNN, came under fire lately for his “self improvement talk” to the Black community. Lemon has run multiple specials on race in America since the George Zimmerman trial started & didn’t receive much backlash until this segment, one he called “Tough Love for the Black Community”. Lemon started out by agreeing with the following comments belonging to Bill O’Reilly:

“The reason there is so much violence & chaos in the black precincts is the disintegration of the African- American family. Raised without much structure, young black men often reject education & gravitate towards the street culture, drugs, hustling, & gangs. Nobody forces them to do that, again, it is a personal decision”.

Not only did Lemon say he agreed with O’Reilly’s comments, he said, “He doesn’t go far enough”. Lemon then gave the following speech, basically a 5 item recommendation list:

*Sagging pants, whether Justin Bieber or no-name Derek around the way, walking around with your ass & your underwear showing is not OK.

*Stop using the N word. Promoting the use of that word when it’s not germane to the conversation, have you ever considered that you may be just perpetuating the stereotype the master intended…you know, “acting like a nigger”?

*A lot of African-Americans took offense to that, too. I wonder if I gave the right advice, I really did. But confirmation came the very next day on my way home when I exited the subway in 125th Street in Harlem. This little kid in a school uniform no older than seven years old, he was crying his eyes out as he walked down the sidewalk with his mother. I’m going to be honest here, she turned to me & she said, “I’m sick of you. You act like an old ass man, stop all that crying, nigger.” Is that taking the word back? Think about that.

*Respect where you live. Start small by not dropping trash, littering in your own communities.

*You want to break the cycle of poverty? Stop telling kids they’re acting white because they go to school or they speak proper English. A high school dropout makes on average $19,000 a year, a high school graduate makes $28,000 a year, a college graduate makes $51,000 a year.

*Probably the most important…just because you can have a baby, it doesn’t mean you should. Especially without planning for one or getting married first. More than 72 percent of children in the African-American community are born out of wedlock. That means absent fathers & the studies show that lack of a male role model is an express train right to prison & the cycle continues.

Here is Lemon’s list:
5) Stop drooping.
4) Stop using the term Nigger/Nigga.
3) Stop trashing the neighborhood.
2) Stop dropping out of school.
1) Stop having children before you’re ready.

Lemon concluded with this:

*So, please, black folks, as I said if this doesn’t apply to you, I’m not talking to you. Pay attention to & think about what has been presented in recent history as acceptable behavior. Pay close attention to the hip-hop & rap culture that many of you embrace. A culture that glorifies everything I just mentioned: thug & reprehensible behavior. A culture that is making a lot of people rich…just not you…& it’s not going to.

Lemon ended with a clip affirming to his viewers that he hasn’t let the Right off the hook, showing a commentator saying the only time Republicans bring up Black on Black violence is to “stick it” to the Black community. After commercial break, the Internet caught fire. HOW DARE HE, A BLACK MAN, SPEAK ON THE BLACK COMMUNITY!!?? HOW DARE HE!!?? RACIST!!! UNCLE TOM!!!! RACIST!!! BOYCOTT LEMON!!! BOYCOTT CNN!! BOYCOTT TV!!! BOYCOTT CABLE!!!! I might have made up the last two parts but it was simply for theatrical effect. Like Cosby, Lemon was labeled an Uncle Tom & a racist for simply giving advice on how to fix their people’s communities. Well, were they right or wrong? Here’s my opinion.

My Take On Lemon & Cosby
After studying these two men’s recommendations, I don’t see them as racists or Uncle Toms, I see them as moral revolutionaries. Cosby & Lemon are not saying act White or that White people are off the hook, they are simply saying act with dignity & self-respect. These are the topics & issues people should discuss with their community if they want it to succeed. If what they recommended is wrong, I guess what we are doing is right? The slow & deliberate destruction of the Black community is a positive thing? We in the Black community have been sold a myth of Black inferiority & self-hate…& oddly enough, some of us seem to derive some form of pride from it, glorifying it in our thoughts, words, & deeds. You have young men & women so brainwashed in myth of Black inferiority that they have inked their flesh with the term “nigger”…their own unbeknownst slave brand. These people who accept the myth of Black inferiority are the TRUE indoor slaves people, not the people who are saying get out of that mindset. Think about it…would Malcolm X say dressing with your underwear exposed to others is acceptable…would Dr. Martin Luther King Jr., one of the most powerful Black men to ever step foot on Earth, describe himself as a “real nigga”…would Mumia Abu Jamal say dropping out of school is very positive behavior…would Dr. Huey P. Newton say speak in a language reminiscent to enslaved Africans on a plantation…would Angela Davis say the more kids born to teenagers the better? No…no, no, no, & no.

I believe what people misunderstand the most about Bill Cosby & Don Lemon is that they think they are telling Black people to “behave for Massa & racism will be over”. Speaking clear English & getting a high school diploma won’t end racism, but it will improve a community because the more educated the residents the better. How many Harvard educated lawyers or Hampton educated doctors go around trashing their neighborhoods, calling little kids niggas? Being better parents & telling the kids to pull up their clothes wont end discrimination, but it will lead to less crime & more self-respect on account of a proper upbringing. If one is raised in a healthy environment with two loving parents with jobs & goals, odds are the child wont disrespect his family & community by running away from a store with his pants falling down with stolen pound cake & a Coca-Cola.

Racism is a factor in the ills of the Black community & must be discussed or else I would look like a fool. Yes cops target Black kids for drug arrests more often than Whites…but what if the Black kid didn’t have drugs on him in the first place? That’s racism vs. responsibility. Yes schools in lower economic areas suffer from underfunding…but if the parents can keep up with the NBA, they can keep up with the PTA, demanding changes & staying involved. That’s racism vs. responsibility. Yes Black unemployment is twice that of Whites…but if more Blacks made businesses for employment instead of relying on someone else’s businesses for employment, more of us would most likely be hired. We can’t control White racism but what we can control Black action.  There is a White Power structure…but killing each other in the name of Waka Flocka Flame’s gang affiliation isn’t going to defeat it…it isn’t going to erect a Black Power structure.  Only powerful Black communities can erect Black Power structures.  Strong, revolutionary, non excuse making Black communities.

In closing, if we truly are in the midst of a race war my people, it’s not a smart idea to complain & wait for the “enemy” to lay down the sword…we must ready our troops & form alliances. We must sharpen our weapons…our body, our intellect, & our tongue. We must secure our fortresses…our communities, churches, & families. I assure you, in a war to end racism, a bunch of non-English speaking knuckleheads with pants below their kneecaps & blunts hanging out of their mouths aren’t going to make the best soldiers. The way to create the best soldiers is through discipline & accountability, responsibility & sacrifice. There must come a point in the evolution of the African American people that we switch the blame from Jim Crow & simply just focus more on Jim from across the corner. My challenge to my fellow brothers & sisters in the Black communities is this:

Let’s blame the man less & do for us more…

We need less “Lemon & Pound Cake” speeches & more “Lemon & Pound Cake” action. OUR FUTURE is in OUR HANDS.

All Power To The People

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  1. ArmyVetChic says:

    I really enjoyed reading this! While acknowledging that racism does, indeed, still exist you have also pointed out the responsibility of the black community to make decisions and act in a way to end the the stereotypes and help themselves.
    Maybe I am interpreting your writing the wrong way and have been told many times that I will never understand because I’m not a black male or just not black, period. However, I feel that there are many stereotypes that are perpetuated by the black community, themselves.
    Crime, racism, and stereotyping may not go away completely if all of these recommendations are followed but it sure as hell would make it pretty damn difficult to continue.
    Great job.

    • Sage says:

      I’m not afraid to tell you that you COULD understand. I have many a white friend that came to realization that being black can be life on the hardest difficulty. You by far don’t understand and that is readily apparent by your comment. Move to South Africa. You’ll understand in under a month. Take no money, but buy your round trip ticket ahead of time and stash it in a safety deposit box in the airport. You’ll understand just fine by then. Before you do that, you won’t. Your entire tune will change. Or maybe you’re one of those rare people that can overcome all odds.

      • ArmyVetChic says:

        I respect your opinion on this topic but I have to point out that we are not discussing the racial climate in South Africa. We are talking about America; the United States. While I do not try to claim I know anything about living in the conditions off any location other than this country, I would expect that anyone trying to make a point about racial tensions here would not try to distract with facts about another country either.
        I welcome honest and on-topic debate about this issue and that, unfortunately, was not on-topic.

  2. […] Lemon & Pound Cake: Racism vs. Responsibility. […]

  3. The initial disclaimer is irrelevant.
    You, along with Lemon & Cosby (and several others in this discourse) are creating these false dichotomies of racism v. responsibility as though the two exist separately and as though both exist in vacuums. Yet they co-exist with several outside factors.

    Yes, I want to uplift my community.
    Yes, I strive to do so and encourage others to do so
    But there are certain facets of that process made particularly difficult by several institutions and racism as a whole.

    I hate to dismiss your writing – and I mean.. good job for saying what you feel?
    But I honestly and emphatically think this article is the issue with the conversation being had.

    & Let me address the specific talking points:
    5) Pull up your pants
    – I personally agree with this because of how I was raised. However: Why should style be criminalized? When it does not extend into indecent exposure – why is it part of the conversation?
    For what? Because people have a negative connotation? Should we also not eat chicken or watermelon in public?

    4) Speak proper English
    – What the hell is this? Americans don’t speak proper English at large. American English is a bastardization of Proper Queen’s English. And there are several dialects within our nation. What accent is proper? How does this help our community? Did you know in a study done based entirely on phone interviews and conversations: Mock potential employers/clients were off-put by anyone who “sounded” black (by accent or level of bass in their voice) even when there were no grammatical errors made. This was last year.
    What makes you think it’s about the way we speak?

    3) Don’t forget the sacrifices of our elders
    Interesting this was after “speak proper english”.
    Our ancestors were forced to assimilate, speak english, become christian, and give up all culture and tradition.
    In remembering my ancestors, I’m infuriated by these conversations.
    I want to “do better” for my community, but too often people assume in order to “do better” we must wipe away all traces of blackness when possible. Why is that our perception of “better”?

    2) Go to school
    …I’m not even going to touch the institutional issues with this and the cycles of student loan debt.
    Naw. You know better

    1) Be a parent
    …So bible belt Christian logic says don’t abort
    Bible belt legislators say no sex-ed
    So when this child is born
    And the mother is working 40 – 60 minimum wage hours a week to make ends meet
    at what point in time is she supposed to be parenting?
    In my experience, it’s only possible when the community comes together to help raise the child, rather than shunning her for what she should or should not have done.

    These points create a list of what divides us to the good and bad negros
    those who are “trying” and those who aren’t
    rather than asking that we not value ourselves as humans by these things
    rather than suggesting that we unite.

    This was catered to a white audience who wants to justify stereotypes/
    an audience of bourgeois black folks who want to be able to justify not giving back
    and explain their success via assimilation as the “proper” way.

    There’s so much more to critique
    But I think you understand my underlying fundamental disagreement.

  4. All your points can be combated with hard facts though.
    Why do I care to use proper english? It’s not a measure of my intelligence. I speak the way I speak if you can’t respect that then the problem is with that person not me. From the very fact that black people have been code switching for decades is proof that our intelligence can’t be measured from our language. The way I dress is the way I dress if you demonize the way I dress that is on you. We have to stop wanting everyone to be the same!! Do you know how boring that would be if everyone had the same culture? There would be no more innovation. Thinking out the box would be impossible because everyone is basically drones…

    “Black kids for drug arrests more often than Whites…but what if the Black kid didn’t have drugs on him in the first place? ”
    -Well, in NYC most of them DO NOT HAVE DRUGS YET ARE STILL TARGETED!!! While whites were found to have more contraband on them when stopped.

    “Yes schools in lower economic areas suffer from underfunding…but if the parents can keep up with the NBA, they can keep up with the PTA, demanding changes & staying involved. That’s racism vs. responsibility. Yes Black unemployment is twice that of Whites…but if more Blacks made businesses for employment instead of relying on someone else’s businesses for employment, more of us would most likely be hired.”

    Black businesses did exist integration destroyed it basically. I do agree we do need more black businesses but when many were trying to start their own businesses banks were giving out “Ghetto loans” so discouraged many.

    Parents can’t be everywhere when they are working just to provide for their families in the first place. We complain when parents aren’t taking care of their duties then we complain when they are going above and beyond to provide yet expect them to be there at all times. The main culprit is our capitalistic society which makes it impossible to be a great parent when you have a low paying wage. Why do blacks have lowing wages? Well think of this. Whites had a big head start blacks were freed but no type of program was instituted to educate them on a nationwide basis. The ones that were able to obtain an education and create thriving black communities well you know of BLACK WALL ST;s History. So we have a nation of freed blacks who have no where else to turn for employment and education. And this cycle continued with the fact that capitalism was making it hard for everyone of lower class. We can’t expect miracles in a community that is underfunded and had a major handicap compared to whites/immigrants to suddenly be able to move up in class. If the grandparent needed to drop out of school to help provide, the child of that grandparent may have to as well at some point, only us blacks were making massive sacrifices so a few children could go to school to obtain education. WE HAVE BEEN RESILIENT! WE STILL HERE AND FIGHTING FOR THE DOORS!

    Have we forgotten how many well dress mannered, well spoken respectful blacks were hanged? Accountability is not thru the way we speak. I know many blacks that have degrees and good paying jobs or are entrepreneurs that speak “hood”. Sagging our pants isn’t going to stop us from getting racially profiled. It has never stopped me from not getting harassed. I dress very preppy by the way. How can we say any of these people because they sag, say nigga, and dress a certain way don’t care about their black people and themselves? WE can’t!!! Self-hate isn’t evident in the way we speak primarily or the way we dress.

    • bwanae says:

      “Parents can’t be everywhere when they are working” > true but in a community everyone should be responsible for the children of the community.
      If a child is where he/she should not be everyone should go tell him to go back where he should be (home, school or whatever) or call the parents and tell them about it.
      If a child is not acting properly, everyone should make him stop.

      In a community, parents should know where their children are. If they don’t, everyone in the community has failed.

  5. bnww says:

    Your article is EXCELLENT!! A lot of comments posted here from people who appear to NOT want to take responsibility and just blame, blame, blame – and justify. That’s the biggest problem in our community – if people acknowledge the problems they’ll have to make a COMMITMENT to do something about it. Many are simply NOT ready to commit to the work it’ll take to better our community. And that’s the bottom line.

    • Sage says:

      How dare you take an underhanded swipe at the opinions of other people. Taking the time to be petty and insult others but being lazy and not doing it properly. That you ever felt the need to do it says a lot about who you are. Take it personal; don’t. Neither matters to me. It is unfortunate you see fit to be so judgmental.

      • bnww says:

        There’s nothing “underhanded” about what I wrote. But I’ll repeat it: if we acknowledge our problems then we’ll have TO DO something about them. Many of us DO NOT want to commit to bettering our community because that means a commitment to do something. Nothing “underhanded” about that at all, Sage!

  6. Sage says:

    Reading the Cosby text; reading the Lemon text, these were infuriating moments. On one hand, they’re taking blacks back in time and telling them they are inferior. On the other hand, they’re saying “Look how much better you could be if you tried more.”

    But we all know, it isn’t what you say; it’s how you say it. They failed the capability exam. If this is not endemic of blacks in a white society, I do not know what is. Had blacks the ability to cope with this message from Lemon or Cosby, the message would not be necessary. That is a crucial portion of consideration.

    Let’s assume most blacks are average. They find defeat everywhere and nobody teaches them how to cope. The school systems are horribly segregated by wealth in districts. Staffed with horrible teachers in horrible districts with horrible supplies. And black kids are supposed to take whatever mediocre tools and overcome this highly sophisticated governmental system that is not afraid to cripple groups of citizens at will?

    Where are blacks supposed to find this empowerment when they haven’t been parented? Where are they supposed to find this willpower when it has been stripped repeatedly? Oh, I think we all agree that black kids die incredibly stupid deaths and for the dumbest reasons. Implying that they feel no shame for their parents is wholly ignorant of the human mind. To outright state they feel no shame is a travesty. Anybody who says that should be lambasted. To know how the Ego works, OF COURSE the kid will keep the act up.

    Ultimately, it is not a fact that I disagree with what is said. I, however, understand that beating people over the head with self-righteous opinions is no way to win people over to your way of seeing life. I grew up arguing from the dictionary. My understanding of people is they friggin’ hate that.

    “It’s easier to fool people than convince them they’ve been fooled” – Mark Twain

    I’ve learned that lesson time and again. And it has been of the most potent lessons I have learned as far as other human beings are concerned.

    Maybe black folk die off. I wouldn’t be surprised and nor would it cause me to lose sleep at night. I won’t go easy. I’ll do my best. But I’m also living my life because I can’t live nobody else’s for them. Cosby sure as hell doesn’t have room to speak, with the way his son ended up. I feel for that man. I loved that man. And I relate to that man. In fact, only recently have I become critical of Cosby. Reading the speech was different than hearing it. But you gotta be elite and live that life you’re talking about. Our dear, beloved Cosby did not.

  7. David M. Green says:

    Re: Where is his father & why don’t you know where he is? Why doesn’t the father show up to talk to this boy?
    Bill Cosby was only partially right and completely failed to point his accusation at the guilty party just as far too many do in this day and age while rushing to blame men for all of societies woes.


  8. I won’t be too long as it’s very clear what needs to happen here. Firstly, Lemon needs to climb down off that high horse with his nasty @ss. He has the nerve to lecture when he still doesn’t know what a penis was made for. Let’s start with the basic Lemon, get that sorted out and then you can talk.

    Cosby–I won’t say too much about him, just that he made his money off of Black people and was silent the whole time. Where were you back in the day–I mean outside of cooning on the big screen? Go back to sleep Cosby.

    What needs to happen in the Black community before anything else, is a mental heath assessments. Most, if not all Black people are mentally beaten down and unstable. We come out of the womb that way, we have been abuse and oppressed for so long our abuse is now in our DNA. We are functionally insane, depressed, suicidal, confused and in need of a long holiday. The next time you go out, look at the Black people you see closely, then say to yourself, “that person is insane”. And you’ll start to see that we are wallowing in PTSD. Or what Dr. Joy call PTSS (Post Traumatic Slavery Syndrome.) And that ‘s not an excuse for anything, that’s just the truth.

    • Sage says:

      How is it you see your argument as valid? You’ve taken it upon yourself to assert, given your limited experience that people are born harboring the afflictions of their forefathers. Although, I see you being extreme in the face of extremity, this is not the way.
      You argue Psych evals? Helpful but not necessary nor effective. Trust me, Counselor pay is nothing short of medical bill territory.
      But, yeah, all the garbage being fed to young blacks is the horrible mess they regurgitate. The true necessity is to pivot the culture towards something less hip; toward something that will allow young blacks to hop on the ladder to success.
      Being extreme won’t help anybody and will be met with the most fervent of oppositions. Your response is case & point.

      • I see you can do a lot verbal juggling that just leads to you patting yourself on the back. But not suggestion as to which way to head. However extreme I may be, I do have my sails up, and I am in some kind of wind, headed is some sort of direction.

        No disrpect intened, but you r

  9. Huh, let’s think about the word “community.” Sometimes it is used as a euphemism for neighborhood, or a certain socio-economic assignment or level of education or experience. Sometimes “community” is used to assign individuals to the place where they are supposed to have originated from and where they are supposed to stay, either because they never left or because they are required to constantly acknowledge, align with and champion the behavior to which they apparently have a life-long assignment, even if that behavior is simply a newly learned fashion by people they’ve never met or worse, a behavior that results a universally bad choice. By the comments on both sides of this debate “community” doesn’t have anything to do with coming together, it is code for something else, something that negates the individual and discourages choice or the development of personal, individual standards and something that fuels the methods and mechanics and the effects of racism. It creates a divide, a deep economic divide that benefits the majority while it teaches black people to fight for the right to keep things are they are and stay put — all in the name of community.

    There can’t be any real debate, because even as I’m writing this I fear the backlash and get flashbacks of the bullying I received from the black kids as a child for “acting white.” It wasn’t until I went away to college and met people who looked like me (black) but who liked all kinds of different things including different genres of music, books and had some of the same experiences I did that I found my, for lack of a better word, “community.”

  10. Well, you certainly have the right handle.

    Let’s keep this simple. I need you to write to me like I’m blind and retarded (no offence). When I say community, I mean everyone that looks like me. I use community because it’s easily understood or at least I thought was. And yes, community can be used to describe your “people”, your friends and those who see the world as you see it. But, for me, (I was raised very pro-Black) community as always meant Black people in general.

    Like you, I was tortured growing up–bullied is not a strong enough word for what I went through. It was relentless, but check this out; the people that bullied me, looked just like me and I was being bullied for the way I looked. That alone let’s you know something is wrong with us. I would tell my mother and father about my treatment, and they always told me that Black people are sick. And sick people want to make everyone else around them sick. 20 years later and thousands of dollars in therapy I can now understand those things. I can now understand why Black people are doing the things they do. A lot of research has gone into making us this way and keeping us this way. Though I don’t subscribe to a lot of what people think of as Blackness (because it’s not Blackness, it’s bullshit) I feel through the cracks. I never got limited to this or that nor would I. I think a lot of our fake culture is embarrassing, but to have people how were instrumental in making that culture come back and shake their finger at it…..NO!!

    • Lisa Grayson says:

      Too late for this game, however, this subject is just too interesting to not comment. The poster above is absolutely right about the label, “the black community”. I ask, which community is that? I am African-Native American CPA female, who was raised Catholic, and live in an upper class mixed neighborhood. Tell me, what community do I belong to? The female community? The community of CPA’s? How about the Native American Community, Catholic community?

      No other groups of race, religion, sex, would allow themselves to be boxed in with that label, because it implies a shared sense of morays, that can be dismissed as “oh well, that is just the black community”, when the truth is, African Americans belong to several communities.

      Frankly, I have nothing in common with some who happens to share my skin color, just as many white guys would tell you they have nothing in common with the Duck Dynasty guys either.

      Understand that the history and oppression suffered by my ancestors have been shared by those who look like me, however, I don’t want to walk amongst people who look like me on a dark night in SE DC. Just a fact.

      The problem is poverty, that knows no “community”. The people in which Mr. Cosby and Mr. Lemmon speak of, are just one generation away for breaking that cycle. What I can do for those whose ancestors shared a similar experience as mine is voting for politicians who recognize the value of keeping pathways to success viable. Schools should remain public and open to all. Children should not go to bed hungry and have access to health care. Birth control should be available to young women. I can’t make a mother wake up her 7 year old on time to go to school, because I have this false sense that she belongs to my “community”. I can’t make her read to her child at night, nor should I bear the burden of being associated with a person that doesn’t share my value system.

      So please–Stop using the words “the black community”, there is no such thing.

      • I wish I knew what you were talking about. I’m sure you wish the same. I did catch a bunch of bragging and I’m not Black like you niggas.

        Be well sweetie. Seriously

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